A clip from my talk on resilience, healthy relationships, and transformation in Boston, Massachusetts.
Rachel, an administrative assistant with a vibrant personality never fails to light up a room and bring a sense of joy to her coworkers. That is, until January hits. Something about the cold, dark months in New England ushers Rachel into her cocoon where she hides until the days get longer and brighter. She shows up for work, but struggles every step of [click to continue…]
What steps can we take to give up a grudge and forgive someone who has hurt, disappointed, or betrayed us?
The following strategy model for learning forgiveness is derived from an amalgam of work by several researchers and my own work as a psychologist:
1. Look deeply into the root of your anger or grudge. Explore the situation honestly without embellishing or rearranging the details. Pay attention to how this anger is holding you back and keeping you hostage in your own day-to-day [click to continue…]
Years ago, I directed the Stress Management Department at the Pain Unit of Boston’s Spaulding Rehabilitation Hospital. My first mind-blowing exposure to addiction came when a diabetic patient communicated her physician’s warning that if she did not stop smoking, she risked having her legs amputated. Several days thereafter she was discharged from the pain unit. Three months later she returned to the hospital, this time with stubs for legs. Still she continued to smoke [click to continue…]
Do you sometimes wish you could adjust your negative way of looking at life to a more positive perspective?
Consider it, because the ratio of your positive thoughts to negative ones has been shown to predict your level of resilience.
Distinguished Professor of Psychology at Chapel Hill, North Carolina, Dr. Barbara Fredrickson discovered that experiencing emotions in a 3-to-1 ratio with positive (3) and negative ones (1) leads people to a tipping point that allows them to naturally experience [click to continue…]